Simple Life
It’s amazing how life can make a 180 degrees turn over one night.
On one cosy night, I was asleep, in deep sleep. After that night, my life made a 180 degrees turn. When I woke up, everything doesn’t feel right. Everything is wrong somewhere.
A part of my life flashed through my head, all the flashbacks, all so happy and cheerful, although there was misery somewhere in between, but I was happy all the time.
After that night, when I woke up, it was all so different. A tear dropped the moment my eyes opened. Sighing was most of what I did. Reading the newspaper, while my mind was in a twirl. Completely moodless and cannot be bothered.
Made breakfast in a daze.
What was I doing?
I don’t know.
Maybe this is all destined, maybe god planned for all these to happen?
When I showered, I sighed.
When I was putting on my school uniform, I sobbed.
Maybe the best way was to write it all down.
I sat and wrote.
Tears welled up in my eyes, refusing to fall. I’ve never felt so bad, so useless, so upset, all the emotions was practically everywhere.
I try so hard to suck it in, but I can’t, it’s too difficult.
I looked at the things around me, I realised, this, all of this is not needed. I don’t need all these things, I don’t want them. All I want is a simple life, where my small family and I will always be happy.
No matter what it is, I am willing to give it all up, just for a simple life.
I don’t want random problems popping up everywhere, taking me by surprise. Random minor problems are okay. Random MAJOR problems are NOT.
All I want is a simple life. No everyone likes a simple life. But I DON’T MIND! I really don’t. All I want is to be filled with joy and happiness, not how to repay certain things, not how to suck it all in and pretend everything’s gonna be alright. It’s not alright. It’s NOT!
All I’m asking for is simple, just happiness would do.
But why?
When I THINK I am happy, something bad seem to happen. Is it wrong to be happy?
Must this really happen?
Can you wake me up and tell me it is all a nightmare?
Can you tell me my worse fears won’t surface?
Can you tell me everything is gonna be alright? Make sure you actually mean it.
Can I go to sleep and never wake up again?
Must I wait till my soul leaves my body to find happiness?